The other weekend I noticed that I had been forgetting to take my depression meds off and on, and now had not taken then for several days. I thought maybe my body/mind was trying to tell me something. What a change. I felt happier somehow. I have accomplished doing some things for myself that i had been dragging my feet about for a while. Procrastination my old friend.
I have an appointment with the local Bishop about being licensed. I found that the new aquatics center has opened, fifteen minute by bike, so I have been swimming. Pray that I continue. I have been making notes about what I have been thinking, and then writing emails and blog entries. OK I am duplicating but www.petard.us/blog, it won’t be all duplicated. I have taken some other big steps to get my life straight. I may even find a way to collect social security benefits. Oh yes, I am now officially old; I can now be a curmudgeon. And I am starting back to the Daily Offices I think; pray for my perseverance.
It may not be all good. I find myself very irritable now that I am out from under the meds. I am much more aware of my anger. I try to read on the bus and all the other people on cell phones and populating Great Nattering On with loud conversation from different parts of the bus are really pissing me off. As is the television on one bus line, full of advertising, telling me how to get straight with the IRS and my credit card debt. All the while I am trying to read and pray. Oh and I think my impatience has shown up in some of my posts. If I am being abrasive, I’m sorry. But I am saying what I think, which is a Good Thing. And a lot of the anger is righteous anger. I had a confessor once who stopped me when I was confessing anger and asked me to see what was righteous anger, which is no sin. Bless you, Mother Julia Gatta.